A few of the questions I get asked all the time is, "How do I discipline my child with special needs? Don't I need to take into account their diagnosis?" 

So, I asked a couple of the parents of the OT kids I have on my caseload who have the most well behaved kids with autism I have ever seen. I want to share with you some of the things that they have conveyed to me.

1. Discipline is different for every child.
2. Be consistent, keep discipline going. It's not always easy!
3. Keep trying for what works.
4. Yes, you will be frustrated and yes you will cry.
5. An example of what was done in a certain situation: My son kept wanting to throw cake at a birthday party at the skating rink. He was being such a handful and it was clear he was overstimulated. Finally, in frustration, I let him throw it on the ground. Then I made him pick it up and throw it away. When he wanted to get another piece, I told him no, that he threw away the only piece that he would get.
6. We did not spank any of our children.
7. I messed up a lot but learned from it, for example, I had read something about when a child misbehaves, taking away toys and then sending him to his room, where there were more toys (not much of a punishment). So, when my son misbehaved, I made him sit in the bathtub. This didn't work out so well so I never did it again.
8. It is absolutely ok to say NO! If after my son was told NO two times and didn't listen, I got off my butt and moved him away from whatever he was doing. Yelling at at kid across the room to stop doing something does little unless you get up and make them do it or stop what you don't want them to do.
9. One time we stopped at a McDonald's on a trip and my son didn't want to leave the playground. He started to pitch a fit so my husband put him under his arm and carried him out kicking and screaming. We did NOT beg, we did NOT plead, we just removed him.
10. Pay attention to your child. NO phones at the dinner table for anyone, for example. We talk to each other, ask questions, etc. 
11. You are your child's PARENT, not his/her best friend.

I know that it is hard and frustrating to discipline a child with special needs, heck, disciplining any child is hard, but it can be done. I hope these tips and examples are helpful. 

Powerful Ways Parents Can Take Financial Control
 
Parenthood is all about making the best choices for yourself and your family. Sometimes, however, it can feel like important opportunities have gotten away from you. It’s easy to convince yourself that if you don’t start parenthood with your finances in hand, that getting them on track is impossible, and this can create quite a bit of stress.
 
Don’t make the mistake of thinking it’s too late to take control of your money. Whether you’re a soon-to-be parent or are teaching your child to drive, you can still make powerful financial choices that will protect your family in the long run. Here’s a look at some of the best things you can do for your family now:
 
Planning for End-Of-Life
 
There are too many uncertainties in life to leave your family’s circumstances following your death up to chance. If you don’t already have one, look into taking out a life insurance policy. This kind of insurance will help to cover funeral costs, medical bills, and lost income, sparing your children from heavy financial burdens and possibly providing for their future.
 
Thanks to the Internet, you have easy access to information about getting insurance.  It’s never been easier to compare rates and make sure you get the best option. You can use online calculators to get a sense of how much coverage you need and what kind of rates you can expect. Remember – the younger and healthier you are when you take a policy out, the lower your rates will be. Since these rates are usually locked in for several decades, the best time to get life insurance is always now. Bear in mind that most insurance providers will require a blood test and possibly an exam to help ascertain your overall health, which helps them determine your premiums.
 
Keeping Close Track of Finances
 
One of the most important things you can do for your finances is to build a budget. Track your spending for a few weeks, and use your current patterns as a starting point. If you find that you currently spend too much to be able to confidently save for the future, figure out ways you can cut costs. Some spending areas, such as monthly bills, can only be reduced so far. Others, like entertainment spending, have much more wiggle room.
 
Finding ways to set limits, cut costs, and stick to a budget during your child’s early years will set your family up for long-term success. Not only will you have control over your finances, you’ll be able to set a great example for your child’s whole life. You can even make a family activity of building and planning a budget: Have your child track and plan how to use their allowance so that the act becomes second nature.
 
Looking Toward Buying a Home and College
 
After you’ve built up your savings, you may want to consider buying a home for your family. While a home can be a profitable long-term investment, you’ll need to be careful to buy one within your means. You’ll need to save up for a down payment and shop for a mortgage with monthly payments you can afford. If you’re a first-time home buyer, an FHA loan may be the best option. PennyMac FHA loans offer lower down payment options and have more flexible income and credit requirements.
 
It’s never too late to start considering what kind of savings you want to set aside to ensure their future. Even if you only have a few years to set money aside, an academic savings plan will still help them to achieve their dreams (affordably). There are plenty of ways you can save for your child’s academic future, but the most common kind of college savings is a 529 plan.
 
These plans can be used toward a four-year degree, but they can also go toward other educational costs, such as trade school, books, or even off-campus housing. Each state offers its own version of this plan, but you don’t have to choose the version from the state you reside in. Take a look at the options and figure out a plan that’s best for you and your family.
 
You may not have your finances together perfectly, but there’s always time to do better. Remember: The earlier you start any kind of savings, the more you’ll have set away. Planning ahead is the best thing you can do for your family’s long-term security and happiness.
 
Photo Credit: Pexels

Click on the title below for a direct link to this awesome book!!

Let me just say this from the start of this blog, I did not have to read this book to already know what is causing autism because it has been smacking us in the face for many many years. If it smells like poo, looks like poo, and feels like poo, than it is poo. 

I will also say this, if I had to do it all over again, I would have asked my mom from the womb to keep vaccinations out of my body and I would have kept vaccinations out of my kid's bodies once I became a mother myself 19 years ago, I just didn't know until about 15 years ago.

There, I said it.

Now, is that to say that vaccinations are the only cause of autism, ADHD, and many other diagnosis, no, actually it is not the only cause, but it is a big huge cause and its time we adopt a brand new way of thinking. A new way of thinking that the vaccination trade off IS NOT WORTH IT, as it seems we are swapping a very minor reduction in a few acute illnesses for an epidemic in lifelong chronic illnesses, including autism, and yes, autism is now an epidemic.

Mr. Handley's book was written from a parent of an autistic child for other parents and was written very very well as this man did his research! What I mean by this is, the man brings to light all of the science that often goes unpublished because of the amount of money it takes to advertise it plus losing your butt over blowing a big ugly whistle (read the book and this will make sense), which clearly points a finger at vaccinations as a cause of autism. If you don't believe me, get his book and you will see the pages and pages of scientific proof. Its all there in black and white.

In his book, he has two distinct graphs that speak volumes if only you will look and think about the gravity of what you are looking at. The first one is the graph pointing out that back in 1970, when babies only got about 3 vaccinations, autism was at 1 in 10,000. Fast forward to today, when a baby is known to have up to 38 vaccinations and you will see that autism is 1 in 36 now. The other graph shows a jaw dropping linear increase in the number of vaccinations that babies are getting and the number of kids with autism. 

The ingredients in the vaccinations causing many of the issues are aluminum and thirmerosal aka ethylmercury, which wreak havoc on our bodies and brains. Read the book to see why, its alarming.

Austism can also happen in the womb if a mom gets sick during a critical part of the baby's brain development. There are a few other ways but I'll keep it simple for now so I can urge you to read this book and when you do, question everything you think you know about your baby's medical journey. 

The trick in all this is the fact that vaccinations are a $20+ billion industry and folks don't like to be seperated from there money but I say this to them, "You are messing with human children who have their whole life ahead of them, but you've altered it in a way to where it will never be the fullness that it could have been. In the process, you have thrown the parents under the bus who will struggle in caring for what you have ruined. Shame on you!"

Now, I realize that the initial intent of vaccinations was to help but now that the cat is out of the bag and it is hurting more than it is helping, step up and make changes.

I cannot tell you how many parents that I have worked with over the last 27 years that say this to me, "He/she was developing just fine and then after his/her vaccinations EVERYTHING changed."

Again, if it smells like poo, looks like poo, and feels like poo, than it is indeed just that, poo.

Read this book, I promise you that it is eye opening and you will agree that change is long overdue!

​ 

Over the last several months, I have been studying and researching why there is autism, leaky gut, the poisons in our food, the rise of autoimmune diseases, the rise of genetic disorders, and how all of this relates to diet. 

I myself have leaky gut and it hurts like heck if I don't stay on my incredibly strict diet because I have inadvertantly done so much damage by eating the foods that I buy at the grocery store, I have decreased what I can eat to very minimal.

I cannot eat foods with gluten, casein, sugar, GMO'S, and all the other poisons that have been added so that the food industry can make more money. Thanks y'all, I don't appreciate it. Pesticides are used to keep the bugs away, GMO'S or genetically modified organisms scare the heck outta me and hurt my gut a lot, hormones aka GMO'S, and probably loads more that I am unaware of to hurry up the growth process of the animals and plants that I have been eating for the last several years put in my food to hurt me.

I also have discovered why I have trouble losing and keeping weight off as my gut flora is so low in some areas that I fear my gut will never be repaired. I am part of a study with the company called UBiome and after getting my results today from my first fecal sample, I have a heck of a lotta work to do to heal myself and it scares me.

If I eat the wrong things, I have gas, bloating, severe pain, diarrhea, and joint pain. This has caused me to miss work, decline lunch and other outings as I fear the paralyzing pain and frequent visit to the restroom, and many other areas of enjoyment that have been affected by my leaky gut.

Leaky gut is rampent in kids with autism and causes a lot of pain, confusion, and brain fog in these kids. They already have enough to deal with without having this too.

I also discovered that I have damaged my bodies ability to produce the proper enzymes to break my food down, which makes things even worse because with leaky gut, the gut wall becomes too permeable and allows my not-all-the-way processed food to escape into my body/bloodstream. That ain't good news for health.

Did you know that 80% of immunity is located in the gut? Given that, you better darn well take care of that gut or you will be sick all of the time eventually leading to an autoimmune disease, which basically means your body starts attacking itself. 

The book above is a must read if you find yourself or your kids dealing with painful stomach/intestinal trouble, diarrhea, inflammation, joint pain, muscle pain, autism, ADD/ADHD, brain fog, and load of other symptoms/diseases. 

Dr. Amy Myers is a functional medical doctor whose goal with each and every one of her patients is to get to the 'why' of the symptoms and does not throw body destroying pills at folks as a quick fix for the complaints. 

As a fellow holistic practitioner whose goal is also to get to the 'why' of what I see in my clinic with my OT kids, I appreciate what she is preaching.

I highly recommend this book to all of you. She also has a quiz on her website, which I have taken, that will pinpoint what might be going on and what to do about it.

I do not know Dr. Amy, but I feel connected to her because she is on the same path that I am of giving our patients the best care and the proper care possible.

Much of my book, that is out on Amazon called 'The Dragonfly Approach,' talks about diet and gut health. Her book just hits this point further home.

Here's to health! Cheers!

I cannot stress to y'all enough, what an honor it is doing a job that I love to bits and enjoy every day. I am equally honored meeting the families and the OT kids as they teach me something each and every moment as well.
Here's what I mean . . .
I had a phone conversation with a new OT kid's mom this morning wich further drove home my utter justification in writing 'The Dragonfly Approach' and here's why.
As I listened to her tell me all about her OT kid and her other two that have issue as well, she repeatedly said, "I wish that after I was given the diagnosis (in her case her son has autism) that someone would have told me what the next step was, what therapies he needed, what could I do with him at home, help him with school, etc. Just some starting point. I would have been so grateful."
The desperation in her voice moved my heart and this type conversation is one of the thousands that I have had with parents who have a child that is/has been diagnosed with any number of issues like autism, sensory processing disorder, a genetic disorder, ADHD, dyslexia, etc. over the last 25+ years.
One of the other things she proudly told me is that once her son was diagnosed, she got online trying to find out anything and everything only to be completely overwhelmed at where to start, which way to go, and many other questions she told me about.
This is why 'The Dragonfly Approach' was written. Written for the aftermath of finding out that your child has a special need and what in the heck to do about it now. The information out there is all over the place and goes in a million different directions and when you are a parent trying to weed through and tease out what in the heck to do, it can be completely overwhelming and very defeating, indeed.
The other day, one of my own kids asked me this, "Why did you write this book? What were you hoping accomplish? Do you hope you get rich?" I chuckled at the last question as wealth is and never has been on my mind. I actually cannot stand money although my mom says not to look at it as an enemy but as a tool. Its hard for me because money=greed in my heart and mind and comes from many years of suffering because of it. I'll stop there.
So, I looked at my wonderful child and I said this, "Imagine that I had the secret to how you could be the best baseball player around but I chose to keep it to myself. How would that make you feel?" He looked at me and said, "Well, I'd be pissed of course."
"What if I had the secret to curing cancer, but I kept it to myself?" He answered, "Mom, get to the point already."
"I have valuable information that I have gleaned from living with it from the moment I was born, in addition, you and your sister had your own issues and I have had the honor of working as an OT for many years with these cool kids. The information I have learned, I cannot keep a secret and I will not keep it a secret. It must be told so that families can get the direction they need early on to help their special needs kids. I hope to accomplish a successful journey for these kids and their families to prevent the frustration and sadness I hear from them every day by 'not knowing.' As for the money, I could care less. That is so far removed from my motivation, you know that about me."
My son took a deep breath and then blew it out saying, "Mom, God has made this possible you know," and with tears in my eyes I said, "Yep, He's had a plan for me from the time I was 8 years old. He let me know that now was the time. I'm one lucky person to have such an awesome God."
We hugged and I had a bit of a come apart because my passion for what I do and this book must be told and as I learn more, I will write another one and another one as things progress and change in my field.
I love all you folks who battle with this thing called special needs and know that each night I am praying for all of you. Every single night!
Love y'all!!♥